Wizards Releases Spiteful “New Tolarian College Merch Alert” Video
Redmond, WA – In response to a recent Tolarian Community College video advertising a new line of college-centric memorabilia, Wizards of The Coast released a video mocking the products in the style of the Secret Lair Alert videos from the prolific YouTube profile.
TCC regularly releases videos deriding the fact that WOTC puts out an abundance of Secret Lair drops, and the company decided to respond in kind.
The video begins with WOTC spokesperson Trent Crosby’s disembodied head appearing and reappearing while screaming “NEW TOLARIAN COMMUNITY COLLEGE MERCH ALERT, NEW TOLARIAN COMMUNITY COLLEGE MERCH ALERT”. After three straight minutes of this, Crosby appears sitting in a red leather chair in front of a few bookshelves, aping the set of TCC videos.
“Well well well, look who needs money, too,” Crosby begins with a sarcastic tone. “Many Magic: The Gathering players have been entertained by a certain professor mocking us, the great gaming company Wizards of the Coast, for trying to put out a great gaming product month after month. We find professional artists from around the world, and legendary IP that people might not even think would work well in a card game, and put them together to release amazing Secret Lair products for the discerning customer. Why mock us for making money off that?
“Well, two can play at this game. In this video I’ll be breaking down the financial value of the new t-shirts, pins, and hoodie available through the TCC.store website, which probably isn’t half as good as the half-functioning storefront we use to sell Secret Lair products. Should you spend your hard-earned money on these accessories to show support for an independent gaming channel, or should you avoid them at all costs? Spoiler alert: I wouldn’t waste your money.”
The video concludes with Crosby reviewing the TCC shirts, comparing their quality to a package of plain white t-shirts from Target.
