Trade War with Midgar Erupts Over Price of MtG Booster Packs

Midgar, Gaia - Tensions grew across the multiverse today as President Shinra the ruling Shinra Electric Power Company issued a surprise 145% tariff on Magic: the Gathering booster packs. This unpredicted tax draws Gaia into the ongoing multiverse trade standoff in a way that this reporter can only describe as a self-imposed wound.

President Shinra issued a brief statement: "For too long we have sat idly by as the bureaucrats at Wizards of the Coast have charged more and more for booster packs. We will be silent no more. If they intend to monetize our names and likenesses to advance that wasteful indulgence they call a shareholder agenda, then we intend to ensure that the citizens of Midgar receive their fair share.

Effective immediately, I am imposing a 145% tariff on all Magic: the Gathering products. This will let Wizards know that we take their funding of Cloud and those other Avalanche sewer rats very seriously and will not tolerate it. Life may be difficult for the Magic-playing citizens of Midgar in the future, but progress requires sacrifice."

The White House declined to comment beyond asking: "What the F@%& is a Midgar?" when this reporter reached out for a response to other-dimensional escalation to trade tensions.

I followed up directly with a message to President Shinra on his PHS to ask for a response to the indifference from the White House: "Oho! Would that I could ignore it when the ruler of another great nation hit one of my major cardboard exporters on the figurative nose. I can promise the citizens of Midgar that I will never look idly by when another nation places a tariff on Mako."

Wizards of the Coast promptly raised the price of a Universes Beyond: Final Fantasy Collector Booster box to 100 million Gil in response, a three percent increase on its previous MSRP, making it effectively impossible for anyone in Midgar to purchase the coveted product. Similar price increases have previously devastated the once-blossoming city of Bikini Bottom and the proud nation of Wakanda.

Stay tuned to this space for more needless trade war escalations and MtG finance news.