Good evening, agent, and welcome back from your vacation to the Louvre. Inside this bubble-wrapped package is an autodidactic messenger. He does not yet know your next mission, but will self-instruct in 30 seconds.
Yesterday, at approximately 12:35 PM Sandwich Mean Time, the communists created a second moon. Locked in orbit over the island of Kaua'i, this socialist sphere has been clocked at three times as lunar as the original Moon while only using half the energy. Our best mathematical models conclude that the new celestial body is capable of overpowering any other cosmic signal, and indeed, our scouts have confirmed an alarming number of werewolves seizing the means of production on the east coast. Your mission: infiltrate the three KGB bases on the north, south, and west poles of the satellite, establish landing points to support our astral troops, and destroy this new moon before it becomes a full problem.
Good morning, agent. I'm spymaster general Michael Celani, and I do things because they're hard. Just when we thought we'd won the space race, the communists launched the Second Moon so they can beat us to that one instead. It might be shocking, terrifying, and physically improbable, but you're here because you're calm under pressure, despite the fact there's significantly less atmosphere on the moon than on Earth. It's time to get ready, agent, because this lunar landing isn't gonna be fake. You won't be alone, either: we're sending you in with one of our top agents, who is going to be reprinted in Commander Masters.
used to be big-time on Wall Street, but ever since the communists seized control of her country and clamped down on black-stock-market deals, she turned from trader to traitor and from commodities to a bonds girl. She's quite the brawler, and for a small investment of just , steals you some valuable intel while sabotaging whomever she's spying on. Anyone can activate this ability, so to make this mission a success, your goal is to ensure that infiltrates all three enemy bases, keeping the focus away from you as your opponents burn each other out.
If you're curious how one person could be at three different places simultaneously, know that the answer is science. See, the important thing aboutis that she enters the battlefield under the control of an opponent. That means if you were to make a token copy of her, you wouldn't have to worry about such trifling matters as having multiple legendary creatures with the same name. Our plan is clear: let's make some extra so that, like PRISM, everyone is a victim of your spying!
- Temporarily gain control of
with something like a or , and then create a token copy of her with or . The copy will enter under the control of an opponent, so you won't have to worry about the legend rule ruining your fun. Plus, since an enemy controls the token at the end of the turn, you won't even sacrifice it, since you can't sacrifice permanents you don't control!
- Don't sleep on here. Yes, you can make it into a so you can copy it, but you can also have it act as a second when you're ready to close out the game, or even transform it into a permanent an opponent controls if it's suitably threatening.
- Alternatively, try copying as you cast her with 's last ability. That leaves two enemies under your watchful eye, and you can even use first ability to double up on the draw and damage, too.
- Don't be afraid to put
in the graveyard, either. We're packing several reanimation spells, and creates an artifact clone of her from the graveyard.
- works very similarly, but it will exile as part of the cost. Sure, this will raise your commander taxes, but it also significantly increases how long your commander can stay out for just one mana a pop.
- If dies during an opponent's turn, bring her right back with , or use it proactively to plagiarize an opponent's .
- Similarly, , , and are all unconditional reanimation spells that are extremely cheap, and their shared downside (if you can even call it that) doesn't matter if you're reviving .
- And although doesn't immediately save your commander when you cast it, you're better off playing it out early and capitalizing on that drain effect.
Don't worry, agent: unlike that time in Moscow, or that time in Canberra, or even that time in Boise, we won't abandon you to be captured and tortured for years in the dank basement of a Wendy's. I hear they served you inedible sludge, and we won't make you go through that again. No, we're sending a couple more agents your way as backup, and they're all great choices to copy with your various mad scientist allies. Speaking of mad scientists, what we're doing isn't strictly legal, so make sure you don't inform the United Nations.
- Both and work like , because they all end up under the control of an opponent. Make as many copies of these guys as you can to give to your opponents, because it only takes a few of them to accrue some serious advantages.
, , and each draw you cards thanks to a zone-change trigger; pretty standard stuff.
- isn't quite so standard, but the copies you create from abilities like have haste. The problem is you'll actually be permanently donating them, since you can't sacrifice creatures you don't control. Use this opportunity to have a little fireside chat with an opponent and make a deal you can capitalize on later.
- can recur amazing spells, like , which will allow you to activate five times over, or our other preview card, , which forces your opponents' creatures to duke it out as you sit back and laugh.
- can Exploit herself to fetch you any card in your deck, and your first call is almost certainly . From there, keep making copies of her to find the cards you need to keep your gameplan active.
- Finally, even two triggers won't kill a standard , but it'll probably snipe most creatures your opponents control and possibly your opponents themselves, too.
Turned to Stone
Well done, agent. You've successfully infiltrated all three moon bases, and our ground troops are making mincemeat of the moon's embedded laser cannons. All that's left for you is to push the button. Namely, the self-destruct button on. Because she's also a robot.
With a few choice cards, like, , or even , we can make a that's also an artifact. Not only does this turn into yet another clone and allow us to copy 's ability with , it also lets us do something a bit more... insidious.
If we enchant our newly roboticwith , or set up beforehand, we can significantly increase how much damage each activation does. Convince your opponents to hold back for a turn, give an artifact to the most threatening opponent, then go in for the kill by having everyone spend all their mana to burn down the threat, destroying everything the enemy has worked for and saving the world.
Congratulations on blowing up the moon, agent. President Reagan has already called to congratulate me for what you've done. Your name will be forgotten, as the names of all great spies are, but don't fret. We've all pooled our bonuses together and got you this $20 gift certificate to Wendy's. Wait, why are you curling up into a ball?
If you enjoy How They Brew It, please check out the Discord and my other projects at my website. You can vote on what article you want to see next, or just check out all the other cool stuff I do, and thanks so much to Wizards for giving us these preview cards. See you next time, where I'm probably going to be, like, an insurance executive or something.
Spy Trio (Xantcha, Sleeper Agent EDH)View on Archidekt
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