Am I The Bolas? - Swinging in for a Trigger

Akiri, Fearless Voyager |Illustrated by Ekaterina Burmak
Hello and welcome to Am I the Bolas?
This column is for all of you out there who have ever played some Magic and wondered if you were the bad guy. I'm here to take in your story with all of its nuances so I can bring some clarity to all those asking, "Am I the Bolas?" Whether it's because of a mean play or even just getting bored with your playgroup, I'm ready to hear you out and offer advice. All you have to do is email markcarbonza@gmail.com!
I'm Mark Carbonza, I'm the guy who took over Xander's Lounge
Ob Nixilis is my landlord! Fitting! Commentary!
This week, a post from Reddit was forwarded my way by a few readers (thanks again!) and it's a doozy.
Hey, Mark, I Saw Something You'll Like
(Post edited for brevity and clarity)
Pro-Tip: When asking if you could 'Poke' a random opponent for an opportunistic attack or damage trigger, don't hit them with a truck.
I had this encounter happen last weekend at a table of EDH.
Player 1: Go-Shintai of Life's Origin
Player 2: Prosper, Tome-Bound
Player3: Akiri, Fearless Voyager
Player4 (Me): Galazeth Prismari
Player 1 hit all his crucial draws and land drops. He managed to fortify his board with a Sterling Grove
I knew this deck wouldn't be a problem for me, since I played a deck that had Devastation Tide
Cue the Akiri, Fearless Voyager
I was on edge, as I did not agree to take 12 commander damage for 'a poke for a damage trigger'. I now saw him as a direct threat, rather than the enchantment pillowfort. So as his damage trigger went on the stack, I redirected that trigger with Deflecting Swat
He proceeds to act surprised and devalued why I just "kinged his plan and support the pillowfort player", completely ignoring the fact he just put me on a 1-turn clock that nobody could block or interact with due to the many Protection of Colours. Still upset, I mentioned many times that adding the Batterskull
Lesson of today: If you ask to poke somebody for a trigger to deal with a different threat, don't smack them with something that's over half of the required damage condition to lose.
Talk (About) Smack(ing Players)
This was a really fun read.
This was sent in to me by a few readers, and I can't thank you enough. I appreciate you reading the column and participating in it. Of course, this post ends with an implied "Am I The Bolas?" I don't think OP feels any regret or remorse, which I understand.
This is about making deals. OP offered to take a hit after discussing with the Akiri player regarding a damage trigger with the information presented to them: Sword of Fire and Ice
The way the Akiri player went about this reeks of dishonesty and goes against a bit of an unspoken rule in Commander: don't go back on your deals.
In some circles, going back on your deals is permissible when presented with new information that allows you to take the game that turn. However, even then, some people don't care. Unless it's a guaranteed lock, most people rarely forget when they've been betrayed, so it's best not to go back on them.
OP made the right call. A bit of a "lemme teach youse a lesson" approach. They used the tools available to them to send a message: "That wasn't cool."
I'm not saying that everybody has to map out everything in the deal, draw up a contract, call up Falco Spara, Pactweaver
It's a little shady, but in this case, I'm way more on board because they weren't the one to offer the deal. If a player proposes a plan and the goal is to be duplicitous, to wordily set up a trap that would not have been successful without abusing the expected trust of a pod, I can tell you I'm not going to look for more games with that player.
Here's a scenario: "If you don't kill my Sen Triplets
Nope. Won't catch me and that person in a game together again.
Make a deal. Stick to the plan. Easy peasy, baby!
That's why this story is frustrating and satisfying at the same time. The Akiri player presented a deal in bad faith: they could have played Batterskull
All said, the Akiri player being oblivious to why this is frustrating and complaining that OP "kingmade" the Shrines player is baffling. Lack of self-awareness is a huge pet peeve, so I hope this player took a moment to self-reflect on the game after cooling down once it ended.
Well done, OP. Solid move. Not the Bolas.
If you would like to send me your story or another Reddit post, please email me at markcarbonza@gmail.com and I will write about it!
Love you. Thank you.