Am I The Bolas? - Navigating Double Standards in Playgroup Dynamics
Oubliette Illustrated by Jim Pavelec
Hello, and welcome to Am I the Bolas?
This column is for all of you out there who have ever played some Magic and wondered if you were the bad guy. I'm here to take in your story with all of its nuances so I can bring some clarity to all those asking, "Am I the Bolas?"
I'm ready to hear you out and offer advice. All you have to do is email amithebolas@gmail.com! You might see your story in the column. You might even hear it on the podcast. Which podcast?
I'm Mike Carrozza, aka Mark Carbonza, and I'm training for the next Olympics.
I'M ZOOMIN'
This week, what to do when you bend but another player won't.
(Post edited for brevity, clarity, a little bit of this, and a little bit of that!)
HEY, MIKE!
Hi Mike,
After reading some of your current and past articles, recently a situation rose up at my usual group, and I'd like your opinion on who you think is the Bolas. I took my Shalai and Hallar +1/+1 counters deck out for its first full table game. Everyone had a strong start, with Gishath, Sun's Avatar across from me, Ayara, First of Locthwain to my left, and Aryel, Knight of Windgrace to my right.
Both black decks had pingers in play early with card draw and artifact ramp, while Gishath had some land ramp into a Helm of the Host and their commander. My start had perfect land drops with an Incubation Druid, which followed with Andúril, Narsil Reforged then my commander.
After splitting all my damage triggers evenly and hitting each player once with my commander to be fair, the Ayara player cast Oubliette on my commander saying "I don't want to hamstring you, but..." before hamstringing me. My board consisted at this point of Incubation Druid +4/+4, Abzan Battle Priest +9/+9, and my now phased out sword + commander. The game was interactive, pieces were played and removed by all. I dropped Vorinclex, Monstrous Raider into play.
My commander was still under Oubliette when I cast an overloaded Fangs of Kalonia preparing to defend against an onslaught of Dinosaurs and Knights, but the Aryel player chose (wisely) to board wipe with Damn instead that round.
In response, I cast Fling, sacrificing a 19/19 Vorinclex. My opponents at this point were Aryel at 38, Ayara at 17, and Gishath somewhere in the 20s. After discussing targets and whether I just kill the Ayara player to get my commander back, I decided it would be unfair when we were soft resetting to kill them and chose to hit Aryel instead taking them to 19. Through life gain blocks I was at 57, but I now had no board state beyond lands and zero cards in hand while each other player had five permanents and at least three cards in hand.
Ayara had 17 damage triggers choosing to target me with all of them citing my life total, which I understand. I politicked that I had literally nothing left beyond lands and life since my commander is still under Oubliette, while also having JUST decided to not kill them and could they split even a couple damage elsewhere like I had earlier. Their response was no and "run more answers in my deck."
Mind you, I base every deck on the minimum 10/10/10 theory of ramp, draw, removal and at least 36 lands, but I just hit nothing. I don't run tutors, avoiding repeated play loops, so my response was, "Well, I regret not taking you out of the game when I had the chance then, but I will keep it in mind next time," which sent the Ayara player into a tangent about me holding a grudge and saying that if I wanted to be that petty, they would just scoop.
I said nothing the rest of the game, drawing into a flood for the next four turns. Meanwhile, Ayara rebuilt on a full hand, Aryel played four Knights and returned Mirror Entity on the turn after Damn while pity removing the Oubliette for me. The game ended with Aryel surviving on one life, nuking Ayara with Mirror Entity while Gishath died to pingers, and killing me after removing my commander.
For a little more backstory, this happens with the Ayara player almost every week regardless of what deck is being played. They full send at me in a turn, then lose to the Aryel player usually and say "let's see how this goes" or "let's see if he has a response," so I know I'm about to die. Two weeks ago, it was all out at me for 58 with their Isshin, Two Heavens as One deck, which I soaked surviving with 12 life only because I removed Isshin before combat knowing it was coming my way.
Otherwise, they would have had double triggers, making it 116 at just me. On my next turn, they said "I have nothing, you can kill me" and then cast Deflecting Palm in response for 14 damage giving the game to the Gishath player instead. Maybe I'm too fair, but when I tell someone I have nothing, I mean I have nothing, which I pointed out in a discussion (turned argument) after the Shalai and Halar game.
Years ago, the Ayara player complained about me playing Imprisoned in the Moon, so I stopped running it. Anything resembling a combo was a problem, so I removed them all. My Rakdos, the Muscle and Miirym, Sentinel Wyrm decks, they "never wanted to play against again" so now, they collect dust in my case. The same was said of my Kaalia, Omnath, Kess, Marwyn, Samut, Nekusar, Uril, and Meren decks, which I all retired over it.
I try my best to be fair and considerate of everyone else at the table and aim for people to have a good time, often choosing fun or funny plays over winning. Yet, when I said anything about Oubliette not feeling fair because it phases everything out, I was told to "build a better deck" even though I have and NEVER hear the end of it. They got up to that and scooped mid game saying "I'm done," telling me to leave as they were hosting, and now I'm considering quitting MTG altogether.
Am I the Bolas for saying something? Or for voicing my frustration? I just want to have fun.
Thanks for your time,
Carta
HIYA, CARTA!
Thank you so much for writing in. As I say every week, without folks writing in, there is no column, so if you, the reader, have a story you'd like to share or a Reddit post I should check out, send it over to amithebolas@gmail.com and I'll get to it here or maybe even the podcast!
This is a juicy entry. I think ultimately, it is important to voice your concerns to the Ayara player if there's any healthy way to move forward. I'll cut this response up into sections.
- The game story
- "Run more removal"
- Hypocrisy re: Imprisoned in the Moon
- Deflecting Palm fiasco
- Retiring decks
- The game story part two: grudges
1. The game story
As far as this game goes, I think there's an argument to be made for Ayara being in the right pinging you down when you're above starting life total after a board wipe. It's the same argument for you "spreading the love" in that it's the most "fair" way to resolve the triggers. However, if I've trapped a build-around commander under an Oubliette against a player with no cards in hand and just a board of lands, I think I'll be safe to focus down or even take out another player. It does seem like suboptimal threat assessment, but when the life total is that high, it's a flashing light that says "hey, at least get this down to 40".
2. "Run more removal"
A pet peeve of mine in this game is hearing this phrase levied against a player having a bad time. "Oh, you're not having fun because I'm controlling you out of the game? You should run more removal."
This completely ignores the fact that it's a singleton format and it's pretty likely you're getting rid of pieces that enable that removal or find that removal or maybe - just maybe - sometimes, the odds are just against you and all of your ten, fifteen, twenty-seven removal pieces are stacked one on top of the other at the bottom of your deck with 40 cards above them.
It sounds like this is someone you've played with a bunch and the game had been pretty interactive (I cut a bunch of details from the email to make it shorter, but there was plenty of removal used throughout); how dare they not know by now that you run removal? How dare they hit you with "run more removal" in response to simply being frustrated. Especially when...
3. Hypocrisy re: Imprisoned in the Moon
You've been asked to not run certain removal in the first place! Wouldn't it stand to reason that if someone is asking for you to stop running cards that will nullify or "trap" commanders that they'd choose not to run them as well? I think this is a huge Bolas verdict based on this part. If I ask my playgroup to eschew tutors save for land tutors or specific decks (secret commanders) and then I rock up with a suite of Vampiric Tutor, Demonic Tutor, and Imperial Seal, rattling them off one after another without any sense of hypocrisy or irony, I'd be a real ass.
The Oubliette play only becomes more infuriating thanks to the Ayara player complaining about Imprisoned in the Moon and asking you to remove it from your deck. Boo!
4. Deflecting Palm fiasco
This sucks. If you're baiting an attack, don't lie outright. "I have nothing" - bulls#!t. Bolas move.
5. Retiring decks
I understand having a playgroup with which you play most of your games and having a few decks that cause a groan at the table. That said, most playgroups I've encountered have found ways to meet those decks' power level to have a pod where these decks can be accommodated or there are discussions about how to make the deck more palatable to the rest of the table.
The sheer number of decks that have been retired seemingly due to this one player tells me something absolutely massive throughout everything you've written: you and the Ayara player should stop playing together unless you air out your frustrations with them. It feels like they are calling the shots and you are bending. I would recommend discussing the fact that when they've complained, you've heard them and made adjustments, outright dismantling decks that you spent time and money on.
They, on the other hand, when met with a request to no longer play Oubliette (a beacon of hypocrisy), you get told basically to "git gud". There are conversations to be had, but you will need to set some boundaries of your own and stand up for yourself. You've bent enough. It might be time to play elsewhere. This might reinvigorate your appreciation for the game, even.
and finally...
6. The game story part two: grudges
I think it's obvious there's some grudge-holding in this story already from both of your sides. Have a discussion about how it feels to play with each other and the underlying resentments therein. It feels clear that you have given up a bunch, but maybe they also have and it's not clear since we only get one side of the story. That said, if I'd been asked to retired like ten decks from a playgroup, I'd probably pipe up about it, especially if the requests are coming from one player.
You shouldn't keep a grudge across games due to game actions. However, you've noticed a pattern with this player. If you decide to keep playing together, I'd say keep this in mind. Is it a grudge if you've picked up on repeated actions and adjust your threat assessment accordingly?
Ayara's the Bolas for all the hypocritical junk, but not for hitting you with all the drain effects. I'm also not a fan of them getting up and leaving when met with a request similar to the ones they've asked of you. This is the kind of person I'd give a few chances to, but that'd be the end of it.
Thanks again for writing in!
