Markiplier’s Custom Magic Card Somehow Most Successful Card At Pro Tour Lorwyn Eclipsed

Richmond, VA — Exciting moments and pleasant surprises were abound the first weekend of February, from the relative lack of Izzet Spellslinger decks to the heartwarming tribute to the late champion Kai Budde, but the thing that caught everyone from spectators to the actual judges by surprise was the appearance and rampant success of one card that nobody expected.

Mark “Markiplier” Fischbach, popular Youtuber and filmmaker, shocked everyone by submitting a deck containing a card that he created himself named “Iron Lung,” a mono-black artifact vehicle that floods the board with blood tokens to drown out the opponent. It made such unbelievable waves in the qualifiers that nearly every other deck began sideboarding the card, even ones that didn’t run black. “It’s crazy how Iron Lung is just an objectively better card than Doomsday Excruciator. What was I going to do, not play it? I had to completely change around my entire strategy for the weekend,” claimed Christoffer Larsen.

“We were originally just going to kick him out of the tournament,” said Pro Tour Head Judge Ebert Siskel, “But then he just smiled at us and told us to check Oracle. Sure enough, it was listed and somehow standard legal. He had brought an entire box that were professionally printed with blue cores and just started handing them out to all of the players while someone with a phone and a ring light followed him around. We didn’t know how to handle this but he technically wasn’t doing anything against the rules.”

Markiplier’s deck sat at the top of the rankings for nearly the entire tournament, beating out Disney’s zoo deck and the Propaganda deck that Amazon had brought, only beaten out at the very end by Sam Raimi’s Island sacrifice deck. Later the next week, he recorded a video on his channel explaining his excitement and emotional journey at the tournament.

“I couldn’t be more happy with how things turned out,” Fischbach explained with tears in his eyes. “This truly goes to show what one man can do with 3 million dollars, a massive established fan base, and a dedicated team of highly-trained professionals. Please stay tuned for my upcoming series, ‘Markiplier Breaks Into A Cartamundi Printing Facility’ to find out how I did all this and you can too!”