How They Brew It - Raffine's Slippery Slope

Raffine, Scheming Seer by Johannes Voss
Meet Jim
Welcome to my laboratory. Shut the door behind you, or you'll let the police in. I'm Dr. Professor Michael Celani, and I'm not a mad scientist, I'm just disappointed. It took years of my life, thousands of Italian lira in research grants, and a few ethical oopsie-daisies, but I've finally cracked the code: I have discovered a scientific, reproducible, and one-hundred-percent foolproof way to bring back a man from the dead. And that man's name is Jim.
Yes, it seems no matter what body you hook up to my patent-pending Reanimatron, they all inevitably resuscitate as Jim, a thirty-five-year-old accountant from Tinley Park, Illinois. Jim is a widower whose hobbies include bowling on Sundays and consuming Viagra. Initially, I thought this Jim duplication was due to a bug in my code, but that's impossible, because I wrote it in Rust. Indeed, further analysis confirmed that "Jim" is simply the default setting for the human soul; every single human being begins life as Jim, and you would not believe how many of them I killed confirming that.
Allow me to introduce my lab partner, Raffine, Scheming Seer
The Domino Effect
There's one truth that we're going to take advantage of when building our army: the default soul is very malleable. All you need to do is give it a little suggestion, or an example to follow, and it'll turn into whatever you want almost immediately.
This deck is all about reanimating clones
It turns out that, while blue has a ton of clones, white and black have tons of creatures that can resurrect other creatures when they enter, so all you need to do is cast a creature like Karmic Guide
Billy and the Cloneasaurus
But hold on a second. At a glance, it seems like the payoff doesn't justify the setup. You might think, "after all is said and done, you only end up with a couple copies of a Young Necromancer
Most clones enter as a straight-up copy of whatever you want. In effect, if you have a thing, a Clone
But some boons are not so small. Auton Soldier
These additional benefits aren't just buffs that get applied to the creature after the fact; no, they become part of the creature's copiable attributes. What that means is if you played a Young Necromancer
Instead of reanimating an army of 2/3s, this deck actually reanimates an army of 7/7s, and if one of those clones
If you're worried about finding these specific, high-value targets, don't: the deck runs plenty of Entomb
Here's the Kick
Once Raffine, Scheming Seer
Phyrexian Delver
Phyrexian Delver
Young Necromancer
Young Necromancer
Karmic Guide
Karmic Guide
There's no way you're paying for every creature in the chain, so if you use Karmic Guide
Angel of Indemnity
Angel of Indemnity
Sister Hospitaller
Alright, forget the other four: Sister Hospitaller
Final Destination
Like a politician who's incapable of keeping their deals with the mafia quiet, I've already mentioned a few of the payoffs we're running. These are the cards we revive as our last creature, once we've exhausted our chain. Let's go through these as well, since which one you'll want to get depends on the situation.
Viscera Seer
Believe it or not, Viscera Seer
Odric, Lunarch Marshal
The main reason to play Odric, Lunarch Marshal
Gray Merchant of Asphodel
If the game's running long, Gray Merchant of Asphodel might be the creature you need to punch through and squeeze the last bit of life from your opponents. Just make sure you're using a member of the Krew that has at least one black pip in its cost, or Gary might be a bit of a flaccid finish.
Angel of the Ruins
Sometimes you just have to blow up two artifacts or enchantments. Angel of the Ruins also makes a decent general reanimation target if you're not ready to go off with your chain yet, since it's basically guaranteed to end up in the graveyard one way or another.
Guardian of Faith
It might seem counterintuitive to phase out all your creatures when you just got them, but Guardian of Faith acts as an alternative to Odric, Lunarch Marshal when you don't have a source of haste to radiate out to your entire army. It guarantees that, at the very least, your chain makes it to your next turn, at which point they'll no longer have summoning sickness.
Serra's Emissary
If you're not worried about removal for one reason or another, then Serra's Emissary might be the creature for you. Give you and your board protection from creatures to guarantee that you not only won't get blocked, but you also won't get destroyed by the crackback, either.
Literally Any Clone
Don't forget, clones aren't just for extending the resurrection chain. If an opponent has a really good creature on their side of the field, it might be worth it to use your last clone as your payoff by copying their thing instead.
It's Alive
I love toying with the fundamental aspects of the human condition! You know, based on my very scientific findings, I'm not absolutely insane. Studies show I'm actually only 95% of the way there! If I keep working at it, maybe I can get up to an even 96% by the end of the week. Wish me luck!
If you liked this How They Brew It, come check out our Discord, where you can chat with like-minded brewers, suggest ideas for the column, and vote on which you want to see next! You can also check out my other projects on my website. Hope you enjoyed reading, and I'll see you next time!
Slippery Slope
View on ArchidektCommander (1)
Creatures (35)
- 1 Children of Korlis
- 1 Viscera Seer
- 1 Wyrm's Crossing Patrol
- 1 Apprentice Necromancer
- 1 Ornithopter of Paradise
- 1 Priest of Fell Rites
- 1 Adeline, Resplendent Cathar
- 1 Glasspool Mimic // Glasspool Shore
- 1 Guardian of Faith
- 1 Mirror Image
- 1 Clever Impersonator
- 1 Clone
- 1 Copycrook
- 1 Evil Twin
- 1 Gigantoplasm
- 1 Mirrorhall Mimic // Ghastly Mimicry
- 1 Odric, Lunarch Marshal
- 1 Phyrexian Metamorph
- 1 Sakashima of a Thousand Faces
- 1 Spark Double
- 1 Stunt Double
- 1 Undercover Operative
- 1 Visage Bandit
- 1 Vizier of Many Faces
- 1 Gray Merchant of Asphodel
- 1 Karmic Guide
- 1 Phyrexian Delver
- 1 Young Necromancer
- 1 Angel of Indemnity
- 1 Auton Soldier
- 1 Sister Hospitaller
- 1 Angel of the Ruins
- 1 Quicksilver Gargantuan
- 1 Serra's Emissary
- 1 Hulking Metamorph
Instants (9)
Artifacts (9)
Enchantments (1)
View this decklist on Moxfield