Am I The Bolas? - Tuning Against Weaknesses

Mike Carrozza • February 5, 2025

Opinion
Karazikar, the Eye Tyrant Illustrated by Jason A. Engle

Hello, and welcome to Am I the Bolas?

This column is for all of you out there who have ever played some Magic and wondered if you were the bad guy. I'm here to take in your story with all of its nuances so I can bring some clarity to all those asking, "Am I the Bolas?"

I'm ready to hear you out and offer advice. All you have to do is email amithebolas@gmail.com! You might see your story in the column. You might even hear it on the podcast. Which podcast? 

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This week, can strengthening against your deck's weakness make you a bad guy?

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HEY, MIKE

(Post edited for brevity, clarity, and then some.)

Hi Mike,

One of my favorite decks to play recently has been my Karazikar, the Eye Tyrant goad deck; it's aggressive, draws lots of cards, and I've been working on improving it for a long time. Through trial and error, I've built it up from an initial power level of five to around seven, and I'm aiming to get it to an 8. Here's where my dilemma comes in:
 
To get it across that line, I need to make it better at playing against its biggest weakness: tokens. While it's great to goad someone's Ghalta, Primal Hunger and watch it become someone else's problem, goading a 1/1 or 2/2 token is pretty meaningless and doesn't protect me from the threat of their remaining tokens after I swing out.
 
So, what can I add to the deck that makes beating lots of small tokens easier? Other than board wipes (which I already have a few of), there are some things that just hurt "go wide" token decks more than any other strategy. Cards like Rakdos Charm, Kaervek, the Spiteful, or Hellish Rebuke. These cards would make up for my deck's weakness against tokens.
 
The problem is that if I put these in my deck, it might make players who play token decks not want to play against me. I want my deck to be powerful but still fun to play against. If I put these "hosers" in my deck, am I the Bolas?
 
Thanks,
 
Haircut Police
 
 

HOWDY, HAIRCUT POLICE!

Thank you for writing in and asking me to weigh in on your story. As I mention every week, if folks don't write to me, there's no column, so if you, the reader, want to send me a story, whether it's your own or one from Reddit or a friend's, please send it to amithebolas@gmail.com and I'll get to it here.

So, Haircut Police - what a name, by the way - I think this is a great question for the column. It hits on a few unspoken elements and it's fascinating. 

You've mentioned you started this deck at a five and have worked up to the infamous seven, but you're aiming for an eight or if I had to guess, maybe closer to a nine. I think the urge to tinker with a deck to make it work super well is one that many Magic players share. What's fun about your case is that you've identified a big weakness and pretty solid inclusions to protect yourself from those weaknesses. I don't think this in and of itself makes you the Bolas, really. Rakdos Charm is a format staple for a reason, and spells like Hellish Rebuke only need to go off once for your opponents to rethink their attacks if you've got a regular pod. 

I think the issue lies in Kaervek, the Spiteful. A Night of Souls' Betrayal on a creature makes it way easier to kill, so that's definitely the "kinder" choice between Kaervek and the enchantment. Nullifying an entire strategy isn't fun. However, that's kind of where you find yourself when you play against tokens. It's a bit of a Rock Paper Scissors scenario, but with Kaervek, you're using a bit of a hammer. Even then, against some decks, Kaervek isn't the right move either! If I've got a Cruel Celebrant out with an army of Spirits, you might be hurting yourself more than anybody. 

That said, is that a bad thing? No! It seems like tinkering with this deck has brought you great joy and excitement and I love that. I think putting these cards in are great picks, and to justify them with "it's like a little board wipe" or "it's on a creature so it's easier to kill" feels fair when dealing with a swarm. I think you should prepare yourself for some feel bad moments, but that said you could always prepare them for those as well by mentioning that you run some token hate. It's not like you're running Illness in the Ranks; you're putting in a Rakdos Charm the premier token gotcha card! 

I feel like these inclusions are fair especially if you're building toward an eight or a nine. It just means that you should expect the targeting or crackback, and you should be asking to play against similarly powered decks. 

I think it's cool to have found the weakness and to shore it up. I also think it's cool to let decks have a weakness!

It all comes down to setting the correct expectations and knowing your playgroup. Tell them you've been working to fix up against the deck's weaknesses and that means tokens. If they pull out a token deck after that, they're up for the challenge or were hoping to stomp you. Give 'em something to fight against. Have fun!

Thanks again for writing in! I don't think you're the Bolas for the choices. Make sure you communicate well!

Mike Carrozza

Mike Carrozza

Mike Carrozza is a stand-up comedian from Montreal who’s done a lot of cool things like put out an album called Cherubic and worked with Tig Notaro, Kyle Kinane, and more people to brag about. He’s also been an avid EDH player who loves making silly stuff happen. @mikecarrozza on platforms